MONDAY'S HUM (04-16-07)
NEW FEATURE EVERY MONDAY
TOP 9 HUMMERS OF THE WEEK!
- SNOWSTORM IN APRIL - Heck, look at the bright side. The white stuff covers up the cigarette butts for another few days.
- VERMONTERS FOR OBAMA - Sure, he's admitted doing coke and has just a tad more political experience than Jack McMullen, but hey, he's so gosh darned good looking! And anyone's better than the cold, steely, enchantress of equivocation --- HILLARY!
- DOONESBURY AND VERMONT - Trudeau's havin' a ball with the Vt. impeachment thing, but what really hit hard was Sunday's cartoon, spotlighting the infidelities of Mssrs. McCain, Guiliani and Gingrich. Wow! We knew Guiliani and Gingrich cheated, but McCain? Say it ain't so. Mitt's still clean, isn't he?
- OH, WHAT A TANGLED CITY COUNCIL WE WEAVE - Kurt Wright is president of the Burlington City Council? Doesn't surprise us. Kurt's like one of those whack-a-moles you see at the arcade - you bop him over the head but it doesn't matter. He just keeps showing up. And what's going on with Tim Ashe. Is he really Peter Freyne's bosses' boyfriend? Does that help? Also, Who do the Dems hate more - the Progs or the Repubs? And will Kurt run for Lieutenant Gov if Dubes runs for Governor? So many questions.
- GOVERNOR DOUGLAS, MACHO MAN - Nobody wants to admit it 'cuz Gaye's a good soul, but she is way out of Jocular Jim's league. The Gov can play hardball, albeit in a sophisticated, kinda geeky way. He's got Symington spinning around so fast she could be a major new energy source for the Green Mountain State, replacing, umm, wind power.
- BACKWARD BANDIT STILL ANONYMOUS - C'mon! Who is he? We gotta know! Whattdaya mean you can't disclose his name! Bullcrappy!
- JAZZ FESTIVAL BLUES - That's it? That's all we get? Chick Corea and Bela Fleck? Damn! Chick WAS okay, but c'mon. Does he still play an instrument? And Bela. Jeez, isn't he in the area every two weeks. Thank heavens Kenny Garrett's comin'. He's cool.
- LONERGAN'S BUYING US ALL A ROUND - So what if UVM hoop coach Mike Lonergan makes five times more than an average social service case worker? What's more important? Men's college basketball or domestic abuse?
- ANNA,WE HARDLY KNEW YE - The father of Anna's kid has been ascertained. Stop saying Joe McNeil did it!