FIVE CORNERS UPDATE
The Essex Junction Five Corners intersection is the place to complete your personal hygiene tasks. Yesterday, the light took so long to change I was able to floss, clip my ear hair and take a spongebath, all the while watching SpongeBob on the portable DVD player. I was actually upset when the light turned green 'cuz I didn't get a chance to cut my toenails, but hey, I'll get to that next time.